Wibbly Wobbly Time-y Wimey Stuff

askenderbro:

‘Twas the night before Craftmas, when all through the yard,

All the monsters were stalking, aggressive, on guard;

The dispensers were loaded on the rooftop with haste,

by Steve, to put those mobs in their place;

Enderbro was nestled all snug in his bed,

While visions of diamond blocks danced in his head;

The monsters outside prepared to attack,

While Steve loaded dynamite on a mine track,

Then out on the lawn there arose such a bang,

Enderbro woke, from his warm bed he sprang.

Then out the door he flew like a flash,

saw Steve in the yard all covered in ash.

The mobs were all gone, all blown to bits,

the ground scattered with deep holes and pits,

”Steve”, asked Enderbro, “Why all this fighting on Craftmas Eve night?”

Steve replied harshly, with anger and spite,

”They wanted my gold,

but I showed them all; those bitches got told!”

Then from the horizon some shadows did rise,

some tall, some short, and some with red eyes;

“Shit, Zombies! Shit, skeletons! Shit, slimes and spiders!”

exclaimed Steve, “Some of those things got skeleton riders!

To the cobblestone fortress! Be quick, let’s go!”

Steve ran to the stronghold, followed by Bro

like the shadows below a floating land mass,

the mobs swarmed the place and broke all the glass,

Then down to the basement they clattered and groaned,

To find Steve in the corner, stating “We’re boned…”

And then, like a boss, Enderbro rose,

Confronted by one of their own, the mobs froze.

”Seriously, guys”, Enderbro said,

”Enough with the fighting, can we all talk instead?”

Silence among them, then a creeper spoke up,

”We ssssseek not to cause fear, or to dissssrupt,

”Thissss human, thissss menace, thissss coward and thief,

hasssss causssssed us much pain, much missssery and grief.

These diamondssss are sssstolen, ripped from our land!

Asssss well as thesssse bricks, thisssss cobble and sssssand!

we ssssseek what is oursssss, and then we will leave,

Sssso hand it all over, the one they call ‘Ssssteve’!”

Steve screamed at the mobs staring him down,

”You won’t take my ingots, or my gold crown!

I earned this stuff, I worked hard and it’s mine!

if you wanna fight, then let’s go, that’s fine!”

But Enderbro knew that this all wasn’t right,

so he got in between them and played the white knight,

”Maybe it’s yours, and maybe it’s Steve’s,

but is it really important on Craftmas Eve?

the diamonds and gold, the dirt and the sand,

are a gift from Great Notch, birthed from the land,

it belongs to us all, and we should totally share,

we should treat eachother with kindness and care.”

The mobs were so moved by Enderbro’s preachings,

they had forgotten about the Great Notch’s teachings,

so for that night all the fighting ceased,

For once in Minecraftia, there was quiet and peace.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 [Enderbro]: i love that story

Merry Christmas

Bountiful Yule

Joyous Kwanzaa

Happy Hanukka

Swagtastic Craftmas

whatever you celebrate this winter have an awesome one

askenderbro: